Diva rates TV's super couples

 By Diva Von Dish, Soap Opera Digest, 1987

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They're romantic, they're pathetic, they're offbeat

They say love makes the world go 'round. I agree. I've been around the planet a few times with Diego and Franco and my athletic friend Hernandez and it's true. When you're spinning you can't feel the Earth beneath your feet. But when love grinds to a halt, it's time to look for a new ride. And that's why I love amusement parks.

But, as an editor I knew once said, back to the point. Some television lovers are really dragging their feet. Others seem to like being stuck in the mud. This time out, Diva went looking for the couples who make love a sophisticated, sexy, stylish and adult bon bon. And I came up short, I'm sorry to say. Puppy love, tainted love, thwarted love - it's everywhere on daytime. But there are enough good couples on soaps to give the hopelessly mismatched and the offensively childish something to emulate. Remember : the life you save may be your own.


Cruz and Eden, Santa Barbara

What's not to like about Cruz ? Passionate, affable, sensitive, handsome - he has all the qualities a woman could want. But look at whom he picked - Eden Capwell, a woman only a masochist could love. Eden spends part of every year undergoing all manner of torture - kidnapping, getting thrown into a tank of sharks, beaten, almost murdered - and Cruz waits out these "spells" so he and Eden can finally plan their wedding, when you and I both know that some disaster is bound to intervene on even that occasion.

Is this the mature thing for Cruz to be doing at his age ? Hardly, says Diva. If Eden wants to sleepwalk through life with that blank stare (induced, no doubt, by her near-constant state of trauma) oblivious to the fact that somebody in Santa Barbara is out to get her, fine. We cannot account for her lack of intuition. But Cruz, you should be married. If you wait for Eden, you may wake up an old man one day. Surely there are other woman in town. Chemistry, love is not enough. You need someone who's not going to drive the premium on your life insurance policy through the roof.